The Stuff of Dreams

Anyone who's born the burden of shopping with me knows I totes heart a good deal. But as I age... rapidly... I've begun to take pause and consider the opportunity costs of running around the city to save a few bucks -- sometimes it just ain't worth it, y'all. Therefore, today's post is all about fashion dreams -- the gorshwa stuff I'd LIKE to buy, budget be damned, versus the fashion realities of being broke and actually considering scoping out the racks of Conway just to get a fashion fix. Yes, fashion realities are sometimes just THAT grim, not to mention cold and dark.

Dream Booties
(Rafe, Simply Soles)
Totally gorgeous, totally named for Pat Benetar, totally $345. Boo.

Dream Hooker Heels
($495, DAVIS By Ruthie Davis, Shopbop)
If you're me, and you're probably not, but even so, you've probably seen a lot of these heels around lately (at least in magazines). They're DAVIS By Ruthie Davis, and they make me feel like a giddy drag bunny. I LOVE the heel insert:


It's just about as bondage as I can get, which is to say, not very bondage at all, so they're PERFECT. And not to foresake them by mentioning them half a sentence after bondage talk, but both of my grandmothers were named Ruth, so, in way, spending $495 on them would be like... no wait... it'd still be ridiculous. And I know for a fact one of them would've said, and I quote, "You need five-hundred-dollar shoes like I need a hole in the head" over the matter. Nevertheless, they (my grandmas, may they rest in peace) and the shoes, rule.

More or Less Realistic Boots (Depending Upon Which Day You Ask Me
($131, Bronx, FashionNympho)
These boots are lovely, elegant and practical, and they appear just comfy enough that one might not end up limping away all Mira Sorvino-like in that hilarious night club scene in "Romy and Michelle's High School Reunion" after going just a few blocks. They're definitely a great price, though I have no idea what Fashion Nympho is, and it sorta seems like the sort of site that would definitely make me hesitate to plunk down my debit card number, but hey, if you really wanna save $20 off the price listed here, go for it.

Pumps of My Reality
($69, Seychelles, Plasticlandclothing.com)
Seychelles, these are super cute, and so are you. And I just want to say... thank you AND your most realistic price point ... for being there for me again.

Completely Unrealistic Jacket
(Ziji, Sugar on La Brea)
"But what?" you may be thinking. "Why, there isn't even a price listed! Just HOW could this be a so-called 'dream' item, hmm?" Trust me. I can tell by her icy glare that she's showing off a pricey piece of tailoring right there. I couldn't blame her for that sneer! And while I can't tell if this is the same jacket, it seems as though my genius Internet sleuthing skills have proven me right -- crazy 'spensie. Yet beauts.

Another Untouchable Garment, This Time, A Dress
($394, Lisli, Frankey's)
Throughout history, men have waged war over dresses far less beautiful than this. Okay, they probably haven't, but it sounds like it'd make a believable beginning to one of those old-tymey fables. Anyway, point is, this dress is perfectly delectable.


Two Accessories of the Same Price, Which Is Very Reasonable (Unless You Can Only Afford to Shop at Forever 21)
($70, Emma Gordon London, Stars and Infinite Darkness)
I love this bag and all of the bags she makes. So creative and pretty pretty princess.

And Also $70
(Urban Bloom)
Seriously, this is gorgeous and elegant, and you could get a much more expensive one by Danielle Pittman, but why?

And Finally... More My Speed
($5, Alternative Apparel, Plastic Land Clothing)

Now excuse me while I melodramatically fling myself over an ottoman.

Fashion Bags Winter 2006

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You are a business woman and carry many documents, laptop and other stuff. But still you have to look beautiful! Modern designers are taking care of us. Bag fashion is very various and polyphonic. Now big leather, similar to brief case bags are in fashion too. Designers even went farther on and you can see the results of their work here:

Fashion bags from LOUIS VUITTON:

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Mmmm, Mittens

So, depending where you are right now, you may or may not be experiencing mitten weather. I personally busted out my H&M five-dollah specials, in wacky chartreuese and magenta and lined in fleece, the other day. Alas, they are looking a bit worse for the wear (imagine that! H&M merchandise, breaking down!) and I'm sort of in the market for a new pair. Gloves are fine and dandy but mittens are way more fun, and you can't do any serious tasks with either mittens or gloves on, so you might as well go with the mittens. To the Internet we go!



Fred Flare mittens, $9.99! Want!



Convertible gloves/mittens, see, are all the rage. These Urban Outfitters "marled" mittens are only $18.

Old reliable Gap has a pair of convertible gloves with a fun splash of yellow on sale for $13.65.



Old Navy sweater-knit mitten-gloves, $12.50. Dig that pom-pom!



J. Crew multistripe convertible gloves, $28. (In case the Fred Flares sell out.)



Anthropologie's $78 mittens have detachable arm-warmers, for when you're wearing a T-shirt under your winter coat and the sleeves are kind of open (a frequent problem in my world).



Orla Kiely's mittens look nothing like her trademark pretty prints, but they do look really warm. Sorta like warm oven mitts. Meh. They cost $279. Double meh.



Crowded Teeth convertible gloves, $19.99. Go outside! (That's the gloves talking, not me.)



Pretty bizarre "two-finger" Free People mittens, $78. Huh?



They also have these striped ones, for $38...



...and these elegant cream-and-black ones, if such a word can be applied to mittens, for $48. Still a bit much for knitted mittens if you ask me.

Wanted: Rain Boots

I'd like to say this post was created to fill the needs of my partner Tamron, who recently noted that she'd like some new rain boots. Alas, this post is for me. And you. And I guess her. As long as she doesn't buy my No. 1 pick. What I'm looking for, specifically, is rain boots that I can splash through puddles with when it's wet, and that are lined with some sort of fleece so my tootsies can stay warm as the weather gets colder and colder. So what I want, basically, is a boot that doubles as a rain boot and a snow boot. And praise the lord! I think I've finally found it, here:



J. Crew sherpa-lined wellies, $78. So bright and cute! How can you go wrong with penguin-adorned boots? I submit that you cannot. I do have a birthday coming up, you know. Just sayin'.

Some other options, excluding the crazy prints, which I feel are a bit played:



Tretorn wellies in olive green, $78.95. I'm partial lately to the matte look for wellies. Lined in fleece (yay!) and also available in navy, plus...



In shorter sizes! I love a splash of color on a rainy day, and these shorter Tretorn orange wellies (still fur-lined) fit the bill. On sale for $51 at Delia's.



Cougar Trixy boot, $55.95. Subtly cool, methinks. Not lined though. And perhaps a bit too sporty on the bottoms. Also available in navy and brown.



If you want to be a little bit ridiculous, these bright yellow wedge rain boots are the ticket. $63.95. I definitely dig these but you probably wouldn't be able to tuck any but your tightest, skinniest jeans into 'em.



Tamara Henriques toile boots, $118. Well that's a bit steep for rain boots, but these are pretty classy for print boots (by the way, Coach has a pretty ugly entry in that category).



Evercreatures matte purple wellies, 29 pounds. I'd pay overseas shipping for these cuties.



How funny would it be if you got thigh-high waders?? Honestly, I think they'd be useful when you're slogging up the street in a rainstorm. And hilarious.

Finally, love these pics of wellies at a festival in England.....

Happy splashing!

Attire from nothing. New tendency.

Dramatic character from the 20 years of the last century inspires many designers. We can create it by taking wide dress with shoulder-strap. You don't need to put on brassiere. But fur mantelet, small bag with long thong and pearls are necessary.

GLAMOUR

You will look like celebrity in such attire. Little black dress, leggings or satin pants. Add glaring heels, bag and underthings and you are ready for a fashion party!

Your bag should be with short thong, that you can carry it underarm.

DECADENCE

If you don't have jewellery, you should'n even put on little black dress, Coco Chanel said. Pearls best match. Add little black bag 3-5 centimeters hells and you are the girl from 20s!

The Doctor is IN?

Whoa. Have Doc Martens gone fashion? The shoes most often seen on 80s punks (and the 00s punks who love them) and pimply junior-high kids everywhere now seem to be boasting a certain upmarket appeal, having expanded beyond their standard clodhopper boot. Don't believe me? Check it out:



Dana knee-high boot, $140.



Chloe slouchy boot, $130. Mmmmm, me likey.



Slate knee-high boot, $140.



Re-Boot tall boot, $153.95.




And my own personal pick: the Stephanie boot, featuring "butt seaming." Sexy!

Some of these boots are not quite there yet, but I think they're headed in the right direction, much like Dr. Scholl's, another formerly niche company that is now courting the fashion-forward. Not to worry, however: Doc Martens still produce some fantastically ugly shoes. To wit:



Springtime boot, $118.95.



Red velvet boot, $153.95.

And on and on, as you can imagine.

Corduroy: Yay or Nay?

If i hadn't just almost emptied my entire bank account with the purchase of a fabulous red ultrasuede ass accessory (read: couch), I would very much consider attending the upcoming meeting of the Corduroy Appreciation Club. There's going to be secret rituals, and speeches, and awards! It's being held on 11/11, the date that "most closely resembles corduroy." This is almost too funny for words, and yet here I am. Making words about it.

The unfortunate thing is, not only do I hold no particular love for corduroy (it strikes me as a bit too collegiate, not to mention audible), but the tickets require that attendees don at least two corduroy items. What? Who has that? Most people who own corduroy have corduroy pants. Maybe a couple pairs. What are you gonna do, wear two pairs of pants?? I suppose if you're all earthy crunchy Brooklyn girl, you might have a hat, or perhaps a jacket. Probably with Performance Fleece inside. Or perhaps a blazer. God help you if you wear a corduroy blazer and corduroy pants, though I guess that is the most likely combo, considering. Anyway, I would go and document the craziness, but unfortunately I gave away my last and only pair of corduroy pants (which were by Calvin Klein and purple and stretchy and comfy and lovely, I must admit), plus the aforementioned financial ughs.

Here are some things you could pick up if you really wanted to attend:



Gap trenchcoat, $69.99. I like trenchcoats.



These American Eagle pants look kinda cool. Though possibly just because they're gray. $44.50.



Target moto jacket, $24.99. Pretty cute style, not sure about the color.



Aha! Here's what I was talking about! The dreaded newsboy cap! Target, $9.99.



Now this would be cute. If only it weren't for children!! Jaffy by Oink Baby skirt, $40.





Luckily the site also has adult-sized items. With snails and owls! Wooh! I mean hooooo! Random Nicole skirt with snail and owl appliques, $118.

Holy crap, Dolce & Gabbana seem to have cornered the market on fugly corduroy! Check this out::



Purple paisley pants, buy it now for $59.99. Yeah, don't.



For ten times the price of that one, you can look like the same kind of wackadoo. $595 for this blazer.



If you're struggling to come up with the two-item minimum required for attendance at the corduroy event, perhaps dress your dog? Though even this pooch seems a bit upset with his dress.... Tank top and corduroy skirt, $19.99.

The Corduroy Appreciation Club meets this Saturday in cord-friendly Park Slope. I am sure it's going to be a WALE of a time...bwaaaaaahahaha! (Sorry....)

But seriously (folks), what does everyone think of corduroy? Acceptable attire for fashionable folk, or don't go there? Comment away!