Why Aren't I Wearing: These Two-Tone Fergie 'Amplify' Heels

I will full-on admit that I like Fergie. Well, I have a soft spot for her. She fully embraces her trannydom, she's always workin' on her fitness, she can do a cartwheel and sing at the same time, she once peed her pants in public and was like 'whatevs,' and her hair is usually fun.

Therefore, I'm NOT at all ashamed to be having thoughts about Fergie's "Amplify" heels. They're bold and transrageous, just like their namesake.

($59.99, Fergie, Piperlime.com)

($250, Current Elliott, Net-a-porter.com)

I'd wear them with these Current Elliott medium wash skinny jeans (if I owned them).

Enter To Win Current/ Elliot Jeans!

($239, Current/Elliott, Chickdowntown.com)

Want these shoutrageously adorable high-waisted flared current elliot jeans? They remind me a little of my beloved Yanuk jeans, which I *ahem* outgrew... err... they shrunk. That's it... Anyway, of COURSE you want these Current/ Elliott jeans because mama didn't raise no fool, and because they're freaking FREE... if you win the FashionBinge giveaway! Also, they're only available in sizes 31 and 32, so know that.

Anyway, tell us why you PHYSICALLY NEED THESE JEANS, and they could be yours. (Only open to U.S., Canada, and Mexico. Contest ends Wednesday, 5/20/ 2009 at 9:45PM EST.)

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