Five Of The Ugliest Shoes I've Seen In Ages

Horbs shoes, in no particular order. Because does ugly really need an order?

($720, Dolce & Gabbana, Luisaviaroma.com)

Sure The Elton John Museum is aware of the recent robbery that took place there...

($1324, Christian Louboutin, Luisaviaroma.com)

Nope. Sorry. You either get to be a boat shoe OR a stiletto, but not both. (Sorry, Fergie.)

($1306, Valentino, Luisaviaroma.com)

It's bad enough that Bea Arthur recently passed away. Did Valentino really have to DEFACE the Golden Girls' beloved couch on top of it?

($595, Pucci, Net-a-porter.com)

These could actually be cute if... no wait. They could never be cute.

($41, Costumes4less.com)

Six and a half inches of faux wood and weep.